Don’t Mind if I Do: Quarantine Australia, Park Royal, Melbourne

Well now, did I get lucky with my quarantine Australia or are people complaining just for the sake of complaining? Didn’t even have to leave the airport, my hotel quarantine is at the Park Royal, Tullamarine.  Sure, they still bused us from the terminal to the hotel, but that’s just to stop us spreading any CoVid-19 we may have acquired as the great unwashed.

How good it this quarantine accommodation?  Everything I need for two weeks of sloth and gluttony. A large room with king bed, space to move around if I’m so inclined, a great desk, mini home office, to write, to finish a few of my many have done blog posts!  The bathroom is even about the entire size of my digs in Spain. There’s bound to be a few bubbles drunk with a few bubbles here.

So what does quarantine look like?

Well, a two-week holiday, meals included.  Complimentary non-alcoholic mini bar, in-house movies, and daily newspapers.  Outfits for the fortnight in the form of two terry-towelling bathrobes.  Week one and week two covered. A weekly laundry allowance, did I not just say terry-towelling robes?  Who’s planning to wear clothes? The only downside, no balcony or opening window but hey, great views.  Off to the left were a couple of golf course’s and behind the terminal Lerderberg State Park and Mount Macedon.

The day to day

So, what is the day to day that happens in quarantine? Not a lot, as you’d imagine.  Food deliveries three times a day.  A knock at the door and then you wait a bit before opening it to collect your mystery food parcel.  A surprising amount of paperwork delivered under the door, daily calls from the heath team to see how you are tracking.

Lots of Netflix, movies, a few puzzles, random spurts of energy that see you doing a star jump or 10 and a few suicides the 16-metre length of the room.  Drunken group skypes with the girls talking over each other.  Really, not too hard at all. Food parcels, gifts and hampers from friends and loved ones. No alcohol deliveries allowed, due to licencing laws for this particular establishment, but wine deliveries through room service.

Day nine we were advised when we were free to check out.  Day ten we had the option to go for a 15-minute walk around the car park, first and only outing that meant masking up, waiting for security to escort you outside and don’t touch anything.  Day 11 we had our first Covid-19 test, the lovely nurses came to the door all hazmat looking to stick a probe up the nose and bring tears to the eyes. It was at this point I mentioned that if, two days shy of freedom, they told me I couldn’t leave – I might need to take them up on the counselling or at least no limit to the wine.

My fun fav activity was Google games, they had thrown up gnome tossing which was way too easy, I come from the gumboot tossing south, but then there was the bloody cricket.  As much as I hate the game of cricket, I was determined that my little green cricket was going to score a century before I was quarantine free.  And it was the night before freedom, that I made the century!  Quarantine goals achieved. Time to go home.

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